Broke, Bruised and Bagless: The Key To Fearlessness

Monday, February 13, 2017

And we're back to where we first started- beaten, broken and broke. How appropriate! Now, don't get me wrong. This is not a depressing story, just an entry. I don't really want to complain about my life because if I were to compare it to everyone else's, I'd say I'd still pick this one. It's just so hard to see where it is going at this rate, to be honest.

Before I came to Perth, I was broke. I barely had enough money to survive. I was living with my lovely mother and her partner so I pretty much had a good life - free rent and free food with no bills to pay and a 24/7 top class care by the most incredible being on earth who will always love you no matter what. All I had to worry about were my own trivial petty desires. It was a pretty good life.

Everything turned upside down when I left for Perth. All of a sudden, I owe a ginormous amount of money beyond my wildest dreams and there I was, thinking to myself that if I avoided credit cards, I won't be buried in debt. Right! Apparently, financial literacy was and still is not my strong point.

Heading to Perth was like jumping off a cliff without knowing if the water is 50-feet deep or half-a-meter high, but you'll jump regardless. You'll jump because of the thrill, the adrenaline, and the high. Sometimes, though, we forget about the pain, the scratches, the bruises and the loss of breath in the process. That before you experience the peak, you have to go through the low.

That low translated itself phenomenally in a form of a backpack. I bought my backpack on a sale rack one lazy afternoon about a year ago. It gave up after a few months, but I still believed in it so much that I fixed it up - best I could, and went on to use it for the next following months. However, it still surprised me when it has finally handed in its resignation. I couldn't believe it. It's done. It won't take anything more. There's definitely no fixing this one and that's okay. It was okay.

Somehow, this struck a chord with me. It reminded me of how you can always stop and let go, even if it's hard. You may even be heartbroken in the process, but you will always come out strong. Before I came to Perth, I was broke. Now, I am still broke, but I am rich in experiences I never would have imagined if I didn't come here. And that is what made this whole journey worth it.

So yes, I am broke. I am bruised and I am definitely bagless- at least for a moment. But that won't stop me from moving forward, because really, why the fuck won't you? You've got nothing left to lose.


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